Relationships are built on communication. I share with you, and you share with me. When we share with each other, we understand each other better, which grows our relationship deeper.
The tricky part is that a lot of communication is non-verbal. I might not use words to tell you if I feel upset with you, but I will physically draw back from you—for instance, by crossing my arms, angling my feet towards the door, or avoiding eye contact. If you don’t catch my physical signals, you might not realize that something is wrong until it’s too late.
Even if you understand the body language signals other people are sending, you might not realize what your own body is communicating. When your body language is cold and standoffish, people are unlikely to approach you, even if you want them to.
Fortunately, it’s easy to make body language a positive part of your interactions. In this section of the guide, I will walk you through the simple, practical principles that will guide you to a great understanding of body language.
Body Language contains five lessons.
Pick up a book on body language and you’ll be confronted with hundreds of pages filled with different body language signals. The hidden meanings of every possible movement, look, and nose scratch is explained in painstaking detail. It makes for interesting reading, but it’s not very practical to memorize hundreds of body language signals.
Fortunately, there’s a better way. There’s only two major body language signals that you need to know: “Comfort” and “Discomfort.” In this lesson, I explain how to use each of these signals in conversation.
There are several body language signals that indicate someone is feeling comfortable. In this lesson, I teach you how to recognize the most common comfort signals and explain how to respond.
Much like comfort, bodies also have several ways to signal that someone is feeling uncomfortable. In this lesson, I walk you through the most common discomfort signals so you will know when your partner is feeling uncomfortable.
In order to respond appropriately to body language during a social interaction, you need to understand the context of the interaction. This section teaches you how to recognize key signals from context that help you to respond better to body language.
Understanding the body language of others is extremely useful, but you also need to understand the messages your own body language is sending. It’s easy for your body language and your words to send conflicting messages, which is a recipe for misunderstanding. In this lesson, I help you make sure that your body and your words work together.